Except…insecurities?

Elisha replied to her, “How can I help you? Tell me, what do you have in your house?”
“Your servant has nothing there at all,” she said, “except a little oil.”
                                                                 2 Kings 4:2

Not Enough.  Do you ever feel like that sums up how you feel? Not enough money. Not enough time. Not enough energy.

I can guarantee you that you’re not alone.

But does God ever ask more from us than what we have? No, He asks us for what we do have, which is exactly what Elisha asked the widow in the above scripture.  While I encourage you to read the whole story in 2 Kings chapter 4, I’ll give you the background.  The widow in the story has creditors pounding on her door, asking for money she doesn’t have.  So she approaches Elisha, pleading for help, feeling like she has no more to give. She’s not sure how she will pay the debts and feed her family.  From her perspective, she can only see what she is lacking and a hopeless situation.  Not enough.

Except.  That one word. Why did she mention the little bit of oil? What made her think to mention it? I don’t know for sure. She might have been using it as an example to Elisha to explain just how little she has. Who knows.  But God used what little she felt she had, to provide for all of her needs.  If you go on to read the rest of the story, Elisha tells her to collect as many jars as she can and pour the oil she did have into each of the jars.  She did as he told her to and every jar was filled.  She was blessed with enough oil to sell, pay off her debts and provide for her family.

As I look at what this widow offered, I wonder what I have, no matter how little, that I need to give to God?  Do I think what I have is not enough?

Sometimes we are trying so hard to do bigger and better things, especially since that is the way of the world, that we forget that we aren’t asked to be bigger and better.  We are only asked to be who we are and take little steps of faith in following God and allow Him to be God.  He works His power through the weak.  When we are weak, He is strong.

In my last blog, I talked about my “issues”.  My pessimist nature.  My lack of go with the flow. My controlling tendencies.  What I didn’t mention is that I know these are just cover-ups for my insecurities.  I second-guess myself constantly.  How I dress, talk, walk, parent.  Even how I drive.  Yes, it’s that bad sometimes.  But what I’m beginning to realize is that those insecurities can be used for God.  Sound a little crazy? Maybe, but I truly feel that the more open and real I can be about my insecurities, the more I will heal from them and maybe help others along the way.  I don’t want to be insecure, but what if God has allowed this in my life in order for me to reach others because I can truly say that I know how they feel.

So while I might feel that I don’t have enough speaking skills, or writing skills (I’m working on that as you read :), or anything that might be what I think God wants from me, I feel like my weaknesses are where God can work through me today.

What is your little bit of oil? What is God looking for you to allow Him to work through in your life?


8 thoughts on “Except…insecurities?

  1. Erin – This is so fabulous and honest. You, my friend, have so many gifts that the Lord is using and you don't even realize it! Stay strong in your faith and he is already doing greater things with you. Keep writing Erin, I love reading your words! I can hear you speaking when I read!

    Like

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